I think I can say with complete sincerity that if you listen to me, your life will go a whole lot smoother than it has been. How old are you? Six? Okay, little missy, listen up.
I know you love to stay home. Mom and Dad are there, and our animals, Snowball and whatever miscellaneous cat is hanging around, and there's the television, with all those great shows. Captain Kangaroo, Romper Room, Beanie and Cecil, The Mickey Mouse Club, I Love Lucy, the Danny Thomas Show. It's great to lie on the floor and watch tv. (Here's a hint, don't complain about the commercials. In the future, the commercials will be as long as the show itself.)
Where was I? Oh, yeah. Susie, you need to go to school and not make such a fuss about it. You will get out of it as good as you put into it. Stop spending the whole 4 hours of Kindegarten with your head on the table crying. (I know the only time you lift up your head is when it's snack time or nap time. Remember, I am there with you.)
And for peets sake, try talking to some of the other kids. Trust me on this, you won't wither away and die if you open your mouth to speak. (Although, as we get older, sometimes we'll wish we could. You'll get this some day when you're around 26.) It's not good to be friendless when you are six years old. And the animals don't count. (Again with the although, you'll find in the furture that animals do indeed make very good friends.) Talk to Susan Brown or Jennifer Self. They are very nice girls. Just don't get too attached. They both move away by 3rd grade. But then Jackie moves down the street, so it evens out.
Oh, and another thing, PUT DOWN THOSE SCISSORS. Cutting your own hair can only lead to disaster. Besides, those bangs in our pictures are hideous. Thanks to us, my two oldest sons have school pictures where they either look like someone gnawed their bangs, or they look like they're going for the total I'll-never-cut-my-hair-I'm-a-hippie style.
More later. I love you.
Me
PS- I don't know who 'peet' is.
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